Which Is Worse?

  • Smoking a cigarette and texting while driving or having an unstrapped child floating around the back seat while driving?
  • Tossing trash out of the window of your car or throwing recyclables into your garbage?
  • Leaving a party without saying good-bye to your host or showing up at the party empty-handed?
  • Raising kids with no Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy or other mythical beings or raising kids with no religion?
  • Leaving your laundry in the laundromat washer or dryer for too long or taking out someone else’s clothes from the laundromat dryer or washer and leaving them in an unsorted pile?
  • Selling alcohol to minors  or selling tobacco to minors?
  • Burning books or laying off teachers because of budget restraints?
  • Skiing without a helmet or playing baseball without a protective cup?
  • Scratching your favorite CD or accidentally erasing a season of your favorite TV show?
  • Children living in an apartment with peeling lead paint or feeding children nothing but junk food?
  • Not kissing your loved one good-night or not kissing your loved one good-bye?
  • Driving drunk or pushing forward in a crowded place?
  • Phoning in a bomb threat or pulling the fire alarm?
  • Sneaking into the movies without paying or stealing a DVD from a video store?
  • Failing to leave a tip for your server or failing to point out the fact that you have been given way too much change back?
  • Being forced to share a communal coffee spoon or being forced to share a teabag?
  • Going through a red light or passing a stopped school bus?
  • Chewing with your mouth open or failing to say “excuse me” after burping?
  • A paper cut or a cracked cuticle in wintertime?
  • Sharing your ChapStick® or sharing your handkerchief?
  • Having no pillow or not having enough blankets on a cold night?
  • Gum in your hair or poop on the sole of your shoe?
  • Being the only kid at the adult table or being the only adult at the kid table?
  • Forgetting your computer ID or calling your child by the wrong name?
  • Being over-dressed at a social event or being under-dressed at a social event?
  • Having a bad hair day or finding a stain on your shirt?
  • Wearing braces as a kid or wearing braces as an adult?
  • A waiter who comes over to your table too much or a waiter who ignores your table?
  • Drinking too much in front of everyone at the office party or loudly passing gas in church and everyone knows you did it?
  • Not brushing before going to the dentist or not bathing before going to the OB/GYN?
  • Spending all day watching a Gilligan’s Island marathon or spending all day watching a Jersey Shore marathon?
  • Reading Playboy solely for the articles or reading The New Yorker solely for the cartoons?
  • Regifting or giving cash in an envelope?
  • Having lint in your belly button or having wax in your ears?
  • Dreaming you’re naked in front of important people or dreaming you’re unprepared for an important event?
  • Forgetting your homework for a strict teacher whom you fear or forgetting your homework for a nice teacher whom you respect?
  • Dropping your lunch tray on a stranger or dropping your lunch tray on yourself?
  • Giving a bad gift or getting a bad gift?
  • Having a car with a really dirty exterior and a clean interior or having a car with a clean exterior and a filthy interior?
  • Being stuck in a never-ending game of Monopoly or playing being forced to play a series of tic-tac-toe games with a younger sibling for hours at a time?
  • Watching reality TV or reading a trashy romance novel?

— The Gang at Kay Nou


3 responses to this post.

  1. I have no problem selling alcohol to minors. Nobody should buy tobacco.


  2. Posted by Anna on January 3, 2011 at 1:01 am

    Did you know that there is a “C’est quoi le pire ?” category of Carambar jokes?


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